He asks the employee for a pair of shoes he likes. The employee, in his experience, looks at the man's feet: "You look like a size 10." The man says: "Yes, but I'm gonna need a size 8." The employee doesn't really understand why but brings out a size 8 and watches the man force himself into these tight shoes. It's a struggle. The man manages to put them on, limps around a little bit, says "I'll take them" and walks out wearing them. Next week the man comes back. Picks another pair of shoes, only this time he wants a size 7. The employee doesn't mind so much, he's selling shoes and the guy pays in full, so he complies. This time it's an even bigger struggle, but sure enough manages with a couple of shoehorns, pays and limps out. The week after, same thing, the man walks in and asks for a size 6. At this point the employee has to ask: "What is it with the shoes?" And the man goes: "Well, my wife left me, my kids won't talk to me, I hate my job and don't get paid enough for it, I have no friends or colleagues, but at least at the end of the day I can come home and take these fuckin' shoes off!"
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Course language
Because you can’t bring a horticulture
Come around the corner and I’ll show you my hole
Another father came next to him and said beaming with pride: "You see that beauty over there? That's my daughter. She's 3 days old." The first father then said with the happiest heart this world has ever seen: "That cutey patootie is my 1 day old son!" There was silence for a moment and then dad #2 said: "Y'know, maybe one day our kids will marry, you never know!" And the first one answered: "Yeah sure...why not?" But deep down he was thinking: "Not in this world, nor the next, will I ever let my son marry someone thrice his age!"
Guess i should have seen a psychotherapist
A Lumberjack is walking in the forest when a tree yells..stop! You can’t chop me down because I’m a talking tree! The Lumberjack says even though you’re a talking tree you’ll dialogue.
Because she wanted to be a cool grandma.
When I opened it up it was silent.
In-N-Out
Bear able
more jokes Here waiting for you
best dad jokesjokes for adultHere, we’ve gathered the funniest dad jokes, jokes for kids, funny jokes, witty comebacks, and hilarious memes from across the web. Whether you need stress relief, a quick laugh, or the perfect icebreaker for social situations, we’ve got you covered!
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